Tim, Emily, Brent and I getting crazy on Rock Band! haha ya we totally sucked!

The pirate lovers! SOOO fun...haha we got so many crazy looks everywhere we went. Im so glad we went to the Halloween party!

Tim and I as pirate lovers... with our 'WT' friends Brent & Miranda...it was so fun to dress up! Dont cha love the curlers and the short shorts ?! I do!

Me & Miranda Lewis (& baby Lewis)... I am obviously a super cute pirate and Miranda is my 'WT' (white trash) friend :) haha- Love it!

Disneyland family reunion 09

Every year in September all of our family heads to Disneyland for the family reunion. It was a lot of fun to be with family and hang out at the beach...!

As part of the tradition all of the family eats at Goofy's Kitchen in Disneyland and its cute cause all the Disney character's dress up & walk around from table to table. The reason i dont look to happy in this picture is cause Goofy was a total creeper! I accidentally called him Pluto...& he wasnt happy about that! The character's that are in costume under the suits dont talk they just do hand movements..so that made the situation even more awkward...He wouldnt leave until i gave him a hug...and it was a uncomfortable 'long' hug...i know that under that sweaty suit there is a nasty old man...eeeww

Tim and i my two sisters Zina & Camilla..& my mama Denise-going straight to Tower of Terror!!

Family photo! We had a blast and it was cute to all have matching shirts!

After all day walking around both parks we were soooo tired! & it probably wasnt very smart of me to wear flip flops all day cause i had blisters :( We were ready for the day to be over.

Rachel Zina and I are waiting with the family for the Star Wars 'training' to begin...my little cousins where in the show and got to go up on stage and fight with Luke...it was cute.

Tim and I with my Aunt Heather...Love her!

Me and my sisters, Eliza and Zina...right before we drug Eliza into the Ocean...lol

Tim looking sexy about to make a run for it onto his skim board...

Tim and i taking a walk down the beach, it was beautiful.

We where craving some fresh fish tacos, so we found this awesome place called Papa's Tacos right on the coast over looking the ocean it was sooo good!!!! I had to take a pic so i never forget :)

Today

I finally told myself this next step i have to take IS real and i have to start planning and getting things ready for the funeral. It was super hard to pick up the phone and call the funeral homes, to tell the lady on the phone that i wanted my babies to be put into the same casket and to discuss my options. Its truly unreal that i am having to bury my babies, it just makes it that much harder. I do feel like i will get some closure when this is all taken care of but in the moment its a horrible thing to face...
I know i am doing a great job at dealing with my situation, but just those little things remind me that im not.
Today i called the Dentist to pay my bill (all the girls in the office know me by name cause i am in their so often) after i paid it, the girl Heidi asked in a cheerful voice 'how are the babies doing', my heart sank, i wanted to hang up but i knew i would probably see her again soon so that wasnt an option...i told her that i lost them both...and then i lost it, just balling on the phone with 'Heidi' the dentist billing lady...she started to cry and said sorry, we hung up. I knew in time this would happen with somebody that would ask that same question and im sure itll happen again, i just didnt know how i would react. Day by day things do get better, i am in a way...happy, im healthy, i have my husband to hold and we have eachother. I am thankful for the things i have and the things i have lost...

9/11

On this special day take a minute and think about who you have that's touchable and not what you have lost. Say a prayer for the families that lost someone 8 yrs ago today. Be thankful that you have the gospel and know that you can see your loved ones again someday.